Dating telephone rules
“Someone can have a fantastic date, but when they get an email [from a dating service] with three other matches,” says Maria Avgitidis, dating coach and founder of Agape Match in Midtown, “fear of missing out takes effect.” But it’s important that everyone is up front about dating other people.
“You have to be really clear on what you want,” says Lindsay Chrisler, a professional dating coach based in Hell’s Kitchen. “Everything goes down over text now, especially between millennials,” Manley says.
Manley is on the same page, but his reasoning is more economical: “Guys still [usually] make more money than women, so they should offer to pay, regardless of whoever asked out whom,” he says.
“There’s a sort of New Age chivalry about that.” Unfortunately, the rule seems even less clear for those in the LGBT community, says Morningside Heights resident and comedian Stephanie Foltz, who is bisexual.
But such shenanigans are now considered passé, given how we’re all constantly looking at our smartphones.
“I don’t want to be with someone who’s going to play games and feel weird if I text them to say hello,” Donahue says.
“Sometimes guys are afraid, too.” And with the advent of dating apps such as Bumble, which require women to make the first move to avoid online harassment, it’s not only common for women to initiate a date, it’s increasingly expected.
“There are definitely guys who would be really into a woman taking charge like that,” says Manley.
The 1996 comedy “Swingers” popularized the idea that cool kids must wait three days to call a date after an encounter.
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