Obsessive online dating
The ups and downs were enough to keep me hooked, as I allowed my feelings about myself to be dictated by the opinions of people I barely knew. Somewhere along the way, I had let my ego get completely tied up in these experiences.I had fallen into the trap of letting my opinions of my failed relationships shape my opinion of myself. While it was often an uncomfortable, awkward, painful, struggle, eventually I was ecstatic when I found a few that seemed to fit.For whatever reason, you were not right for someone else. It is easy to get hung up on the “whys” behind their decision, but dwelling on them doesn’t change the reality.If you aren’t right for someone else, they aren’t right for you.
I find that super intriguing, want to go get a drink? After a while, it’s easy to feel like starting your collection of cats and totally giving up on the idea of ever meeting the right person.No wonder I felt horrible and had lots of go-nowhere relationships. Then, just like the lifespan of my favorite bras, the support system failed and the underwire started digging in.When this happened I felt horrible, and went out looking for my next fix.“I am flawed.” “If I spill my guts to someone else, they will run.” “I can’t be vulnerable.” “I’m not enough.” “I’m going to die alone.” “If I commit I will be trapped.” And on and on. When you hear yourself repeating any of these negative statements, say, “stop” and replace the thought with a positive affirmation.I like to use “I am whole, I am love,” but use a positive statement about your worth that resonates with you.